8 Things I Have Learnt About People [UPDATED]

I Love humans- more than animals, and in my quest to comprehend them - and why they act the way way they do, i tried to study them - through books and personal interactions - in order to get some illumination.

Below are some things i have learnt about humans so far:

1. People want to be loved. Whether it’s by their family, friends or a lover, abi Lovers. We all do...we all want someone to make us feel loved and important. Otherwise, we’ll just feel like we’re broken in some way. We need to feel worth it, we need to feel special.

It is similar to what Mary Kay Ash told me that year:

"Everyone has an invisible sign hanging from their neck saying, 'Make me feel important.'......"

2. People want to be Preferred. Truth!!! There is this internal craving that humans have to be preferred, chosen OR desired over some other person. We may often deny this fact. You may be denying this even now...hiding behind the i-do-not-care-what-anybody-thinks-about-me talk. But then, that is a story for the gods B.S we try to make ourselves and others believe.

Okay, if you still dey argue, lemme ask: have you NEVER felt upset when someone else was preferred/ picked/ chosen over you?

Never Mind, lemme answer: NO

***i rest my case***

3. People Pretend. This is another way of saying "People are Unpredictable".

They are not always what they seem to be. It is therefore risky to assume that you know 100% of what OR who a person is, because verily, verily i say unto you, "Most times, you only know about people only that which they let you." 

It makes no difference how long you think you know them...You never really know them.

4. People have Problems. Everyone has a problem, including the seemingly UNICORNS. No one really has a very easy life - without obstacles. The only difference is: Some people have their problems written boldly on their faces, while the others mask it with a smile.

Whenever someone comes across as truly difficult, I try to think (sometimes) about what kinds of stuff they’re dealing with. Chances are they’ve been up some emotional OR psychiatric shit creek without any paddle. That makes their acid tongue (a lil bit) more bearable.

Other times, i just......***okay, forget that, just know: PEOPLE have PROBLEMS!!!

5. People want their Problems solved. Those who hide their problems somehow wish somebody can read through their faces, and help them out with the paddles - like help them paddle through the shit creek.

Those who do not know how to hide problems still want everybody to see what they passing through. But in addition to #4 above, People want their problems solved.

6. People can be Misunderstood. Over the years, i have learnt to (especially when it comes to People's Bad Behavior) believe nothing of what i hear about people, and only half of what i see.

Cos the truth is: sometimes, people's actions and attitudes are misunderstood.` And there is a reasonable explanation for what you see.

"Never be too quick too judge people's options. You have no idea the options they had."

***The phrase "too quick" was bolded for a reason, SLOWNESS IS A VIRTUE. IF YOU MUST JUDGE, WELL, TAKE YA TIME.

7. People often hurt themselves more than Others. This is a difficult and sad concept to grasp. But whether it’s through addictions, dating the same jerk over and over, making one person the ULTIMATE source of our own Happiness or not realizing that we’re great and special - in our own way, We are often the root aetiology of our problems.

People like to play the blame game and scapegoat their issues on to something else - like their childhood, environment and parents. While that is all very understandable, there must come a point in everyone’s life when we have to take responsibility and realize YOU are the Captain of ya own Ship and Master of ya fate.

8. People Change. It happens. Maybe because of THIS or something else, They do Change...so Do NOT get too surprised when they do.

PS:

These MAY not apply to the 7 billion people on earth (variations are prone to happen, but they are common.

Victory 'Learner' Anosike.