Wednesday 15 April 2015

HOW TO Get Over Someone In 7 Straightforward But Uneasy Steps



You know, there was a time when I fell in love. (mbaaa, not AGAPE) I wish I could explain how I fell, or how i knew for sure that i was in it but that shit is like a copied assignment - I cannot explain it.

It wasn’t really the increased heart rate and pulse I felt when she was around me. Neither was it really the increase in my plasma oxytocin levels...*not like I did an assay sha.*
It was not even the fact that I felt like i needed to be better than I was, for this person…or so i thought, at that time.
Now she wasn’t perfect, I saw plenty flaws jor!!! but I loved every bit of it.

Long story cut short, it didn’t work out like I hoped it would. Now if you’ve been in that shoe, you know that e can pain!!! Especially when you begin to assume that you finally found someone whose weirdness is compatible with yours...but then you cannot fit kill yourself...you shouldn't kill yourself. There is so much more to live for.

Over my years on earth, I have met a lot of happy people (friends) who suddenly got depressed...because of someone they liked who didn't feel the same...or stopped feeling the same. A whole lot of them seemed to be drowning in the ditch of dependence and depression. Some of them managed to leave the ditch - but their lives changed (>>> SEE>>> )

My observations on the subject of being in love made me propose the theory that states:

being in love is like an addiction…to a substance – a drug. The (pharmacological) remedy for drug addiction revolves around: Isolation from the substance (of dependence) AND Replacement with a non-addictive substance (that will cause no dependence).

This theory is the basis for every advice I have given to my clients people who tried to get over someone (an Ex or a Crush)...It is also the basis for the advice I have given myself when I got struck...that year.

I must however state that I am not saying that these steps are 100% perfecto, although they have worked out for many.
***I will be using the pronoun 'She'...but it's same for males and females.


1. REALIZATION. She's not gonna change her mind...okay, wait, she might actually do so and send a message saying: "I have shange my mind." but to get over her, don't expect that...you should move on with ya life, my brother.


2. ACCEPTANCE. She doesn't like you...like you do. If she ever did, not anymore. But that is okay, that shit happens. The important thing is that you imbibe and practice the concept of Self-love.


3. UNDERSTANDING. She has a reason and she made a choice. She may not tell you exactly, but she does have a reason and a freedom of choice. As hard as it is, o boy, Respect that!!!
Also, if she has someone else...at the moment, you cannot categorically expect her to leave her new guy for you - just like that. okay, wait, she might actually do that...in like 1 in 100,000,000...000 cases. dont expect it.


4. DON'T TAKE IT PERSONAL. Do not kill her - and kill yourself...or not kill her - and kill yourself...and then leave a message stating that:
You just took your life because you could not imagine life without her as she is the only being that gives your life meaning.
Let it go. One key to being happy that I discovered is: to take nothing personally.


5. DELETE HER CONTACTS from Ur Mobile Device. Yaaaaaaaa...that's hard, but i said 'uneasy', remember. This step might be necessary to avoid the temptation of trying to alter the choice she made...or (like we see in movies) FIGHT FOR HER LOVE. Listen, my guy. The first remedy for addiction is ISOLATION FROM THE SUBSTANCE. SHEBI i have said that already.
It is impossible to get over the substance - of addiction if you still have it in your pocket.

And, NO, you do not hate her, you will probably get those contacts later - but for now, you really need to restructure your life.


6. DISTRACT YOURSELF. I proposed a theory (one year like that) which states:
there is never a vacumm in life. when one thing is taken, it is replaced by another.
So basically, if you do not fill in the void yourself, Life does that for you.

what i am saying? Distract yasef. Trying to get over someone is creating some kind of void...a necessary one...but not filling that void is B.J...bobo juice. Engage in other activities. Meet other girls, get in their company. You will probably soon realize that there are many similar stores in the market - if only you can leave the one you are in.
***You should however know how to draw the line between activities that will 'SELF-DISTRaCT' and those that will 'SELF-DESTRuCT'.



7. GIVE YOURSELF TIME. You are hurt. You need time to heal. You are scattered, You need time to gather yourself, to take control, to once again, BE THE CAPTAIN OF THY SHIP & MASTER OF THYSELF.

This whole getting-over-someone ish is a process. Respect The Process.


Victory 'Emotional Rehab' Anosike.

2 comments:

  1. wow! this is making-sense. truly awesome. Love is not a by-force thing. people should learn that.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Man You're on Point! You touched my Heart with this piece! BigUp!!!

    ReplyDelete

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